I haven’t always been a wild man. I haven’t always lived in deep alignment with my soul. For most of my life I was living for others, or at least what I thought others wanted from me. I was living by “what I should do”. I went to college, got good grades, got a respectable degree, and even became a 9th grade biology teacher for a hot minute. I did well in school, I was a good teacher, I had good friends, but I was extremely unhappy. I wasn’t depressed but I was gray, neutral on my best days and felt stuck in life. I hid behind big smiles, and told lies to myself because it was easier than facing the truth that I wasn’t happy.
When things would go wrong in life I would always say things like, “Screw this! I just want to be a mountain man!” or “ I just want to go live in the woods and live a simple life”. My close friends would say, “why not go do it?” To which I would reply with a hundred different excuses. “I don’t know enough”, “I don’t have enough” basically saying, “I am not enough”.:
During my years searching for meaning I came across Matthew Woods herbal book, “Earthwise Herbal”. In that book, I looked up some plants that would help with several independent imbalances in my body. I found one plant that covered them all! “Wow!” I thought, “this plant was made for me.” I read on about this plant I had never heard of called agrimony (pictured above)
In his description of Agrimony, Matthew basically said something along the lines of, “I don’t believe in magic, but this plant is magic. Agrimony gives people courage around their vocation, so if you’re a lawyer and you’ve always wanted to be a sailor, if you take agrimony, you will quit everything and become a sailor.” Haha I laughed out loud at this and literally said to my brother next to me at the time, “ha I wonder if I take this plant if I will end up being a mountain man” I laughed because it seemed so impossible.
3 months later after drinking agrimony tea every evening, I finally decided to start living from my heart: I quit grad school (the first thing I had ever quit), grew out my hair and beard (essential for the mountain man look) and decided I would move out west and find an outdoor job (what I always wanted). Since that decision, my life has felt like magic. I have found my souls purpose in this world and I couldn’t be happier.
I say all of this not to brag or to pretend like o don’t have any problems but to inspire you all to live according to your deepest souls desire. If you don’t know it find it. It’s not always easy, and it can be scary and hard but I promise it’s worth it. Keep searching. Oh and try some agrimony tea for some added support. :)
Making big changes in our lives can be really scary and difficult. I was lucky enough to have close friends and family that supported my changes and my journey. Many of us are not as lucky in life. Therefore, I have created a program that allows everyday folk to deeply connect to the natural landscape and their inner landscape in order to help bring about healthy, connective, rooted change in their lives. The program is called Deep Remembering.
This program is for anyone who wants to make a change in your life and learn skills to be more adaptable, emotionally, physically and skills-wise.